Lorry Jokes

Funny Lorry Jokes
  • I’m in trouble with the wife again.
    I bought her some lorry oil for her birthday…

    Apparently it’s pronounced ‘L’Oreal’.

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  • My friend died following an accident with a cement lorry…There’s already a statue of him!
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  • BREAKING NEWSA lorry load of Brillo pads was stolen last night…Police are currently scouring the area!
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  • BREAKING NEWSA milk lorry has crashed on the M1. Police are advising drivers not to cry!
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  • BREAKING NEWSA Cadburys lorry and a Lego truck have collided on the motorway…Police say the road is choc a block!
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  • On my first day as a delivery driver for Mr Kipling I had to do an emergency stop…Fortunately the lorry had exceedingly good brakes!
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  • A man was run over by a red lorry, then a yellow lorry, then a red lorry, then a yellow lorry.The Policeman that had to inform his family said, “I am sorry but there’s no easy way to say this…”
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  • A lorry load of Brillo pads was stolen last night…Police are currently scouring the area!
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  • BREAKING NEWSA lorry carrying snooker equipment has shed its load on the M1.Police are reporting cues in both directions!
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  • After £1 million worth of sex toys are stolen from a lorry in Kettering, police say the suspects may be sitting on the evidence and it’s unlikely they’ll come quietly!
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  • BREAKING NEWSA driver has crashed his Pringles lorry following a tyre blowout…Once it popped, he couldn’t stop!
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  • BREAKING NEWSA lorry carrying incontinence pants has shed its load on the motorway. Police are warning of long delays due to rubberknickers!
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  • I got knocked off my bike by a council lorry preparing the road for cold weather.“Why don’t you look where you’re going!” I shouted through gritted teeth!
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  • A man has just been ran over by a red lorry, then a yellow lorry, then a red lorry, then a yellow lorry…The police said there was no easy way to tell his family!
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  • *man gets run over by a red lorry, then a yellow lorry, then a red lorry, then a yellow lorry* *policeman informs family* “There’s no easy way to say this”…
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  • I almost got run over by a Mr Kipling lorry earlier…Thankfully for me it had exceedingly good brakes!
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  • My mate died in an accident with a cement lorry…There’s already a statue of him!
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  • BREAKING NEWS: A man arrested last week for allegedly stealing a lorry load of fireworks has been let off!
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