The Best Short Jokes About Midgets

Even the title is a pun in itself. Sometimes the best way to get through life is by laughing. Check out our favourite jokes about midgets in this list.

What is the difference between a dwarf and a midget?

Very little.

I saw my midget neighbour at a bus stop

“Jump in, I’ll give you a lift home” I said.

“Bugger off” he shouted back.

“What an ungrateful little man” I thought as I zipped up my backpack and continued my walk.

Why does everyone respect midgets and dwarves?

They never look down on anyone.

What do you call a party with 100 midgets?

A little get together.

Did you realise

…that dwarfism is a growing problem around the world?

Why are midgets so good at picking up girls?

They are amazing at small talk.

Did you hear the story about the midget who was climbing down the prison wall?

It is a little con descending.

What do you call a psychic midget wanted by the police?

A small medium at large.

What do you call it when a midget waves at you?

A micro-wave.

Why do midgets laugh when they run?

The grass tickles their balls.

When is it okay to beat up a midget?

When he’s standing next to your girlfriend and telling her that her hair smells nice.

When dwarfs get high…

Do they just get medium?

A dwarf walks into a bar

He hits his head and falls down.

I know you were expecting a better joke but the bar was set too low

What did the midget say when I asked him for some money?

Sorry, I’m a little short.

What type of milk do you get from a dwarf cow?

Condensed milk.

How do midgets cut their pizza?

Little Caesars.

A midget stumbles out of the bar…

He was a little drunk.

What do you call a chubby midget?

Low fat.

I got into a car accident with a midget…

He got out of his car, angrily shaking his fist and yelled, “I’m NOT happy!”

“Well,” I replied, “which one are you?”

Why should a midget not attempt to slaughter a cow?

The steaks are just too high.

Did you hear about the guy who’s been pickpocketing midget charity workers?

How could someone stoop so low?

What did the doctor say to the midget?

You’ll have to be a little patient.

We hope that our jokes about midgets gave you a little laugh. If they didn’t, as always, please let us know your best midget jokes in the comments below.

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