The Funniest Jokes About Snails

Let’s face it, the funniest jokes are about random subjects. Here are our top funny jokes about snails.

A guy walks out on his porch and finds a snail climbing the steps.

Not wanting to step on it, he picks it up and throws it across the yard.

About a week later, he goes out on his porch and finds the same snail climbing the steps again. The snail looks at him and says, “What the hell did you do that for?”

Two snails were chatting.

Snail One: How are you doing?

Snail Two: I had to have my shell removed today.

Snail One: So how are you finding it?

Snail Two: I feel a bit sluggish.

Why do French people eat snails?

They don’t like fast food.

Two snails were in a race, and they tied.

I guess you could call it a snailmate.

What is the definition of a slug?

A snail with a housing problem!

What was the snail doing on the highway?

About one mile a day!

Are slugs just snails that have gone through a divorce?

“Yep, she got the house.”

How do snails get their shells so shiny?

They use snail varnish!

I felt so guilty after I stepped on a snail this morning.

You should have seen him, he looked genuinely crushed.

A man opened a snail farm.

He said that it is a slow moving business.

People on diets usually eat lots of snails.

They try to avoid any fast food.

The other day

I heard about a snail that finally boomed with confidence after a long time. I guess she finally came out of her shell.

What did the snail say as he slipped down the wall?

How slime flies!

Whether you’re absolutely howling or feeling a shell of your former self, we’ve got plenty more funny jokes for you. Got some better funny jokes about snails? Slime your way into our comments below.

You already voted!

Leave a Reply